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Boundaries in Dating is the most helpful dating resource we have read in years. It is sure to become a classic. If you are looking for practical tools for finding the love of your life, you can’t afford to miss this outstanding book.”
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How Happiness Can Hurt Your Marriage


I (Dr. Cloud) was talking to a young man one day about his girlfriend. He was thinking about getting married, and he had questions about their relationship. Several times during the conversation, he said that something she did not “make him happy.” It was clear that this was a theme for him. She was not “making him happy.” When I asked, he said that she wanted him to deal with some things in the relationship. He needed to do some work that took effort. It was not a “happy” time. When he had to work on the relationship, he no longer liked it. At first, I was trying to understand what the difficulties were, but the more I listened, the more I saw that he was the difficulty. His attitude was, “If I’m not happy, something bad must be happening.” And his immediate conclusion was always that the “bad” was in someone else, not him. From his perspective, he was not part of any problem, much less part of the solution. Finally, I had heard about as much as I could take of his self-centered ramblings. “I think I know what you should do,” I said. “What?” he asked. “I... Continue Reading »

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Beyond Boundaries Video with Dr. John Townsend


Do you ever wonder when it’s the right time to reconnect with someone who broke your trust? Do you wrestle with knowing how to tell if someone has truly changed after you set boundaries with him or her? These are big questions that Dr. John Townsend answers in his book, Beyond Boundaries. Today, we are excited to feature a 50-minute online webcast that Dr. Townsend recorded. In this video, he explains how to move past earlier pain in order to experience the love we want to enjoy. Hurtful relationships violate our trust, causing us to set healthy boundaries. But, to experience the freedom and love God designed us for, we eventually have to take another risk. We have to be willing to go “beyond boundaries.” Watch as Dr. Townsend takes you beyond the pain of the past to discover how to re-enter a significant relationship. Whether you’re trying to restore a current relationship or begin a new one, his material based on Beyond Boundaries will help you: Reinstate appropriate closeness with someone who broke your trust. Discern when true change has occurred. Reestablish appropriate connections in strained relationships. Restore former relationships to a healthy dynamic. Learn to engage and be vulnerable in... Continue Reading »

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The Cure for the “Can’t Be Done” Virus

It was the Fourth of July and I (Dr. Cloud) was at a celebration that included a memorial “paddle out” on surfboards in the Pacific Ocean to honor and remember my brother-in-law, Mark. He was a Navy SEAL, a great American, husband, father, hero, brother, and a friend. Mark died on a mission in Iraq in 2008. My ten-year-old daughter Olivia, wanted to participate in the paddle-out to honor her uncle. So, we borrowed a surfboard and began to walk out to the beach where the surfers were gathering, with me carrying the board. I was excited for her to take part in honoring her uncle Mark and was inspired by her fearlessness in wanting to paddle way out into the ocean with all the adults. She did just great and when we came back to the beach we hugged. She was very proud and thankful for her uncle Mark and we spent a moment talking about all of it before everyone gathered their things to make the long walk back up the hillside to the main event. Everyone, that is, except Olivia and a few other people who had decided to go back into the ocean and catch some... Continue Reading »