Boundaries Blog

During a difficult season in my life, I asked a mentor of mine if we could have lunch. He had always given me such great advice and perspective. This time he listened, didn’t say much, and then wrote a few Bible verses on a napkin and handed it to me before we left the restaurant. Don’t get me wrong, I love the wisdom of the Bible, but to be honest, I was looking for more....

You have seen it on a thousand cheesy motivational placards: “If you believe it, you can achieve it.” Or as Henry Ford said, and I absolutely love this one, “The man who thinks he can and the man who thinks he can’t are both right.” Or as Napoleon Hill taught everyone, “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” Always a Zig fan, I love his version, “Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.”

When I was engaged to my wife, Tori, she wanted to go skydiving together for her birthday. I had zero desire for that vision, but I did have a desire to not wimp out on my fiancée’s birthday. That vision got me to consider jumping out of a plane, but I still needed ...

Question: Dr. Townsend, my mother makes snide comments that she will threaten to harm herself if I don't come home for every major holiday and her birthday throughout the year. How am I supposed to respond to her comments?

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It's not funny, and is actually troubling, for a mom to make these sort of comments, even if she says she is joking. A part of us will always wonder how serious this is. The great majority of the time, these "guiltifying" statements are actually indirect expressions of disappointment, sadness or frustration that the person does not feel safe admitting....

It's every parent's nightmare: having a teen on drugs. This is not life as God designed it. Substance abuse causes the breakdown of all that is good. Enslavement replaces freedom. Detachment replaces love. Chaos replaces order. Despair replaces hope.

Many young people abuse alcohol and drugs, and this problem is not likely to go away anytime soon. I (Dr. Townsend) can't overstate the danger of substance abuse. It can, and often does, lead to poverty, injury, disease, and death....